This one ain't a joke... or is it? Culled it from one of our local newspapers. Cut off the lengthy bits, but kept the main points. Just to show that life around here is not boring...
It was in the early hours of Wednesday, July 7, at precisely 4.30am. The place was Port Harcourt, the main crude oil center in Nigeria.
On its way from Paris, the Air-France Airbus 330 lowered its huge and bulky frame like an eagle about to perch, not on a branch of a tree or on a rugged mountain, but negotiating a touchdown at the Port Harcourt International Airport after hours of a smooth flight, across seas and large swaths of land.
As it approached the runway, with the front parts of the big bird raised up, and as its rear parts was lowered for its big rear tyres to land on the tarmac, the pilot, Mr. Cambus Patrick, had no idea he was landing, not exactly on a regular tarmac but on a herd of fifty cows.
There was a crash of sounds emanating from the violent impact of steel, bloated and heavy tyres with the sturdy and rugged bones and muscles of heavy and strong animals followed by intermittent clap of sounds like the roar of distant thunder.
Seven of the fifty cows died immediately and for a moment, the Airbus 330 veered slightly, over a considerable distance at that frightening speed, from the runway.
The twenty years of flying experience by Mr. Patrick was brought to bear on those crucial seconds and he was able to bring the big bird fully on its course on the runway and eventually to a successful landing.
Nigerians were outraged at the incident, saying they felt scandalized that cows could be roaming, at night, the tarmac of one of the top international airports in the country.
The Minister of Aviation, Mallam Isa Yuguda stated that "The International Airport Port Harcourt here, as you are all aware, is a very good airport but needs improvement..."
The minister’s order for cows found on the runway to be shot at sight was immediately put to test. About 400 metres from the Government Lounge of the airport where he was addressing newsmen, two cows were lying on the ground. They had been shot dead by airport security men. And one could observe during the inspection exercise at the airport that one of the dead cows was being skinned …… Perhaps, whoever was skinning the robust cow got wind that the Minister of Aviation was in the premises and hurriedly left his "post mortem" to continue the exercise immediately a whistle is blown that Yuguda had left Port Harcourt.
Asked if it will be out of place for the cattle rearers to pay compensation to Air-France, the minister said: "I may not be able to answer this question because in the first instance I don't even know the cost of repairing the aircraft. It may take probably 200 to 300 cattle and I don’’t know if about 300 cattle can be found around here. Maybe you know better than me. Secondly, the animals that are being reared by this people are for your own benefit and my own benefit because we are the people who eat the meat, so if you scare then away and make it impossible for them to have pasture and feed the animals well to have very good meat for you to eat, you have yet another problem of protein deficiency. So the whole idea of getting them to pay for it…………"
The minister assured that as soon as funds were made available, the perimeter fence would be put in place and also explained that any official found culpable in the mishap would be sanctioned.
He commended the pilot of the Airbus, saying "There was no accident because there was no carelessness on the part of the pilot. The pilot must be one of the most experienced pilots on the Air France fleet for him to have successfully maneuvered the aircraft, you know, he got the aircraft back to the tarmac without running into the bush and without any panic or injury because I heard from Air France that the landing and control of the aircraft was such that, the passengers never knew that something happened. Only that some of them did comment that the pilot had a very rough landing..."
It was in the early hours of Wednesday, July 7, at precisely 4.30am. The place was Port Harcourt, the main crude oil center in Nigeria.
On its way from Paris, the Air-France Airbus 330 lowered its huge and bulky frame like an eagle about to perch, not on a branch of a tree or on a rugged mountain, but negotiating a touchdown at the Port Harcourt International Airport after hours of a smooth flight, across seas and large swaths of land.
As it approached the runway, with the front parts of the big bird raised up, and as its rear parts was lowered for its big rear tyres to land on the tarmac, the pilot, Mr. Cambus Patrick, had no idea he was landing, not exactly on a regular tarmac but on a herd of fifty cows.
There was a crash of sounds emanating from the violent impact of steel, bloated and heavy tyres with the sturdy and rugged bones and muscles of heavy and strong animals followed by intermittent clap of sounds like the roar of distant thunder.
Seven of the fifty cows died immediately and for a moment, the Airbus 330 veered slightly, over a considerable distance at that frightening speed, from the runway.
The twenty years of flying experience by Mr. Patrick was brought to bear on those crucial seconds and he was able to bring the big bird fully on its course on the runway and eventually to a successful landing.
Nigerians were outraged at the incident, saying they felt scandalized that cows could be roaming, at night, the tarmac of one of the top international airports in the country.
The Minister of Aviation, Mallam Isa Yuguda stated that "The International Airport Port Harcourt here, as you are all aware, is a very good airport but needs improvement..."
The minister’s order for cows found on the runway to be shot at sight was immediately put to test. About 400 metres from the Government Lounge of the airport where he was addressing newsmen, two cows were lying on the ground. They had been shot dead by airport security men. And one could observe during the inspection exercise at the airport that one of the dead cows was being skinned …… Perhaps, whoever was skinning the robust cow got wind that the Minister of Aviation was in the premises and hurriedly left his "post mortem" to continue the exercise immediately a whistle is blown that Yuguda had left Port Harcourt.
Asked if it will be out of place for the cattle rearers to pay compensation to Air-France, the minister said: "I may not be able to answer this question because in the first instance I don't even know the cost of repairing the aircraft. It may take probably 200 to 300 cattle and I don’’t know if about 300 cattle can be found around here. Maybe you know better than me. Secondly, the animals that are being reared by this people are for your own benefit and my own benefit because we are the people who eat the meat, so if you scare then away and make it impossible for them to have pasture and feed the animals well to have very good meat for you to eat, you have yet another problem of protein deficiency. So the whole idea of getting them to pay for it…………"
The minister assured that as soon as funds were made available, the perimeter fence would be put in place and also explained that any official found culpable in the mishap would be sanctioned.
He commended the pilot of the Airbus, saying "There was no accident because there was no carelessness on the part of the pilot. The pilot must be one of the most experienced pilots on the Air France fleet for him to have successfully maneuvered the aircraft, you know, he got the aircraft back to the tarmac without running into the bush and without any panic or injury because I heard from Air France that the landing and control of the aircraft was such that, the passengers never knew that something happened. Only that some of them did comment that the pilot had a very rough landing..."
