Aircraft Repairs
After every flight, pilots complete a gripe sheets, which conveys to the mechanics problems, encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The form is a piece of paper that the pilot completes and then the mechanics read and correct the problem. They then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems, know as submitted by QANTAS (Queensland and Northern Territories Aerial Surveillance) pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, QANTAS is the only major airline that has never had an accident.
P = The official problem logged by the pilot
S = The actual solution & action taken by the engineers.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 fph decent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks causes throttle levers to stick.
S: That?s what they?re there for.
P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you?re right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S:: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with words.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
After every flight, pilots complete a gripe sheets, which conveys to the mechanics problems, encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The form is a piece of paper that the pilot completes and then the mechanics read and correct the problem. They then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight.
Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor. Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems, know as submitted by QANTAS (Queensland and Northern Territories Aerial Surveillance) pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, QANTAS is the only major airline that has never had an accident.
P = The official problem logged by the pilot
S = The actual solution & action taken by the engineers.
P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.
P: Test flight OK, except autoland very rough.
S: Autoland not installed on this aircraft.
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.
P: Dead bugs on windshield
S: Live bugs on back-order.
P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 fph decent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.
P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.
P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.
P: Friction locks causes throttle levers to stick.
S: That?s what they?re there for.
P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.
P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you?re right.
P: Number 3 engine missing.
S:: Engine found on right wing after brief search.
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious
P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with words.
P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.
