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Thread: Are You From Alaska??

  1. #1
    Cub Kid's Avatar
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    Are You From Alaska??

    Most of the Alaskan folks have probably seen this one a few times, but for everyone else...

    YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM ALASKA IF:

    -You've never met any celebrities.

    -Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor on the highway.

    -"Vacation" means driving to Chitna to dip net

    -You've seen all the biggest bands ten years after they were popular.

    -You measure distance in hours.

    -Down south to you means Anchorage.

    -You know several people who have hit a moose.

    -Your school classes aren't cancelled because of cold.

    -Your school classes were canceled because of ice.

    -You've ridden the school bus for an hour each way.

    -You've ever had to switch from "heat" to"A/C" in the same day.

    -You think ethanol makes your truck "run a lot better."

    -The last thing you do before going to bed is plugging in your vehicle.

    -You see people wear bib overalls at funerals.

    -You see a car running in the parking lot at the
    store with no one in it no matter what time of the year.

    -You end your sentences with an unnecessary
    preposition. Example:"Where's my coat at?" or "If you go to the mall I wanna go with."

    -You install security lights on your house and
    garage and leave both unlocked.

    -You think of the major four food groups as moose, caribou, beer, and squaw candy.

    -You carry jumper cables and a blanket in your car.

    -You only own 3 spices: salt, pepper, and ketchup.

    -You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit
    over a snowsuit.

    -Driving is better in the winter because the
    potholes are filled with snow.

    -You think everyone from a bigger city has an accent.

    -You think sexy lingerie is tube socks and a flannel nightie.

    -The local paper covers national and international
    headlines on one page but requires 6 pages for sports.

    -You think that moose season is a national holiday.

    -You know which leaves make good toilet paper.

    -You find -20 degrees F "a little chilly".

    -You know all 4 seasons: Almost Winter, Winter,
    Still Winter, and Construction.

    -You know what a real sockeye is, and have a recipe
    for candy ones.

    -You know if another Alaskan is from the city or
    the village as soon as they open their mouth.

    -You can spell words like Chatanika, Ninilchik, and
    Tuntutuliak.

    -You've ever had cabin fever.

    -You own moose nugget ear rings.

    -Mosquito dope is a part of your daily attire.

    -You think the song Breaking Up is Hard to Do is
    about spring time.

  2. #2
    Big AK's Avatar
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    Hookers in Carharts

    Politicians in Carharts

    Brides in Carharts

    Extra-toughs in church

    ...noticing that we're gaining over 5 minutes of daylight each day that goes by...

  3. #3
    mvivion's Avatar
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    And, in the REAL Alaska (north of the Alaska Range) we're gaining over 6 minutes a day.

    Course, it was -35 in Galena this AM.

    MTV

  4. #4
    skukum12's Avatar
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    formal wear with sorel boots at the performing art center.

  5. #5
    Ursa Major's Avatar
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    Travel luggage consists of ice coolers (or fish boxes) wrapped with duct tape.

    A seven course meal is a sixpack and a can of SPAM.

    The first thing you see when the snow melts is a blue tarp.....
    Mike

  6. #6
    StewartB
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    The first thing you see when the snow melts is a blue tarp.....
    Which, coincidentally, contrasts nicely with the Tyvek siding.

  7. #7

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    No matter how nice the restaurant is you will still see someone wearing their hipboots.

  8. #8
    Cubus Maximus's Avatar
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    I remember when some friends of ours daughter got married in Homer. She wore white bib overalls and her groom put on clean black jeans and ball cap.

    Brad

  9. #9
    Dave Calkins's Avatar
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    Bunny boots.............






    ......you know what they are.

  10. #10
    FlipFlop's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cubus Maximus
    I remember when some friends of ours daughter got married in Homer. She wore white bib overalls and her groom put on clean black jeans and ball cap.

    Brad
    Sounds like a class act to me... In Kalafonia they get married on the beach naked...

  11. #11
    RedBaron's Avatar
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    People telephone you asking for someone, you tell them that person is "Outside", and the caller wonders why they can't come to the phone.

    When there's a Chinook, and the temp. goes up into the 30's to 40's, most everyone's running around outside in T-shirts.

    In the village, a peeping Tom is named "Tommy Tookalook". :P

    RB

  12. #12
    Luke_theDrifter's Avatar
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    Looks like we might FINALLY get some more snow

    State bird~~>Super Cub<~~or~~> Mosquito<~~?????????

    Wears Bunny Boots & Bug Dope outta necessity, each season resepctfully.

    Good flying....>Byron

  13. #13

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    When you answer the phone and it's a wrong number, but you know the number of the person they were trying to call off the top of your head.

  14. #14

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    A real Alaskan doesn't care about earning Alaska Airline miles cause they are already home and they never want to go any where else. Even if they did they would fly themselves. Not to mention the interest rate on the card is too high! Why didn't I take the plane off floats this winter??
    Tim

  15. #15
    Dave Calkins's Avatar
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    You own more cars than tires to put on those cars!!

  16. #16
    flyguybri's Avatar
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    You have bigger tires on your plane than on your car.

  17. #17
    PA12driver's Avatar
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    When you look all areound and can't find a clean five gallon can cus you used the last 2 for honey bucket and they are frozen solid still!

    The Dog would rather sleep outside, cause you got to many pairs of Mukluks, bunny boots and shovels piled up in the porch.

    YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN ALASKA WHEN

    You wonder why they keep putting all those holes in those bunny boots for laces when you only use the last couple anyway and there are knots in them too?

    Where when the Snow first melts, the grass is still green for two day then it dies and comes back when the mud leaves

    Where you go out to the lake and put the floats on, when the ice gets to only 1 foot thick

    When you don't have room for another 5 gal of AV gas, but the Oly beer has got to go! (right Torch)

    When they close the school cause the sun is shining (first time this year)

    When your personal luggage gets bumpef from the Airline flight but 6 trophy racks come out on the thingy at the end of the flight,

    When the only rental car available is a 63 Rambler and you gladly pay $100 a day with free milage (not much road in Bethel or Aniak)

    When you can go to jail for no fishing licence but no one cares if you have a drivers licence

    and On and On

    Tim

  18. #18
    AlaskaAV's Avatar
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    Now I am really getting homesick.

  19. #19

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    Quote Originally Posted by funseventy
    No matter how nice the restaurant is you will still see someone wearing their hipboots.
    Funny, I saw a guy in hipboots as I waited for my burger at Dairy Queen in Hurley, WI last weekend. Probably a Yooper. Change 'moose' to 'deer' and the whole list reflects Yoopers as well.

    You might be from Wisconsin if you know what a Yooper is.

  20. #20
    R. JOHNSON's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tripleoption
    You might be from Wisconsin if you know what a Yooper is.
    Born and raised in Wisconsin and have no idea what a yooper is.

  21. #21

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    Been in CA my entire life and know an upper penninsula guy, UPer, or yooper when I see one. Remember da yoopers ?

    S.

  22. #22
    moneyburner's Avatar
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    uh, yup, you bet - we caught a yooper up there by Brainard one time - the fish and feathers boys put an ear tag and a radio collar on him and set him loose . . .
    They tracked him all the way to Wasilla before it quit. . . .


  23. #23

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    Quote Originally Posted by R. JOHNSON

    Born and raised in Wisconsin and have no idea what a yooper is.
    Haha, you need to get out more.
    The movie 'Fargo' pretty much covers all the stereotypes of those Yooper/Minnesowtah folks.

    Deercamp (all one word up there) is coming up real soon, ya. I'll get my fill of 'Da Yoopers music for sure.

  24. #24
    S2D's Avatar
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    cubkid was lucky this was done earlier!! Nowadays Steve would have to delete it cause there were no airplanes in the joke !!

  25. #25
    85Mike's Avatar
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    "The second week of deercamp"by the Yoopers is my favorite. They'll be playing it on the local stations any day now. Check it out!!
    MIke

  26. #26

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    you know you live in alaska if you think a traffic jam is waiting on the taxi way waiting for other planes to take off and if you throw out anything you can just so you can fit as many rolls of duct tape in your plane as you can

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