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As good as Yogi Bearism's

flyrite

Registered User
Lyons,GA
















APROSDOKIANS are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence is unexpected; Winston Churchill loved them:






1 Where there's a will, I want to be in it.











2 Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.











3 If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.











4 War does not determine who is right - only who is left.











5 Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.











6 They begin the evening news with 'Good Evening,' then proceed to tell you why it isn't.











7 To steal ideas from someone is plagiarism. To steal from many is called research.











8 In filling in an application, where it says, 'In case of emergency', notify: I put 'DOCTOR.'











9 I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.











10. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they look sexy.











11. Behind every successful man is his woman. Behind the fall of a successful man is usually another woman.











12. A clear conscience is the sign of a bad memory.











13. I used to be indecisive. Now I'm not so sure.











14. Nostalgia isn't what it used to be. Nor is there any future in it.











15. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.











16. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in your garage makes you a car.











17. Finally: I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it’s getting harder and harder for me to find one now.















And my personal favorite:















I am not arguing with you, I am explaining why you are wrong













































 
I think therefore I am, I think?

All things are relative, all relatives are things, my relatives took all my things.
 
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