View Full Version : The Airline Pilot - Dean Martin and Foster Brooks

12-05-2006, 08:54 AM
This has been getting emailed around for a week or so now, I thought it was worth posting. Really classic Foster Brooks drunken airline pilot routine on the Dean Martin show. They don't make funny guys like this anymore.


There are some other classic Brooks videos on there as well, but I think this one is about the best.


Jerry Gaston
12-05-2006, 09:12 AM
Steve you remind me of Foster.

12-05-2006, 09:27 AM
Steve you remind me of Foster.

Jerry, my beard is not that white yet...


12-05-2006, 10:42 AM
Good buddy of mine is RON here in MSP tonight. He's coming by for dinner. I'll have to show this to him. He will love it. Steve it is true, they just aren't that funny anymore...

Ruidoso Ron
12-05-2006, 06:38 PM
I think I've flown with that guy!

Steve Pierce
12-05-2006, 08:53 PM
Flown with him? That is you in disguise. :o

12-08-2006, 04:10 PM
'I Won't Blow Up My Plane'
Updated: 14:42, Friday December 08, 2006

A drunken airline pilot who was nearly seven times over the alcohol limit has been jailed for four months.

Emirates captain John Cronly-Dillon had downed so much he repeatedly stumbled at a Heathrow security check-in.

The Australian ate a whole packet of chewing gum and swallowed copious amounts of water but could not hide his inebriated state.

Cronly-Dillon, 51, was just minutes away from flying a plane load of passengers to Dubai and "putting their lives at risk" when he was arrested.

He had even joked he would "not blow up my own plane", when items were confiscated from his baggage.

London's Isleworth Crown Court heard Heathrow security staff became so concerned they called a supervisor who in turn alerted the police.

They arrived and gave him the equivalent of a roadside breath test. When he failed it, the officers arrested him.

Further analysis showed he had 134 micrograms of alcohol in 100 millilitres of blood.

Douglas Adams, prosecuting, said: "The limit for someone performing the function of captain is 20 micrograms ... so nearly seven times over the limit."

Cronly-Dillon pleaded guilty to one count of "performing an activity ancillary to an aviation function" while over the drink-fly maximum on September 13.

His arrest had left passengers fuming while a replacement pilot was found.

12-22-2006, 11:43 AM
I doe....I..I....duh-duh-duh.....I doooooann't (HIC!) g-GET IT.... :(

CloudDancer :anon

12-23-2006, 07:40 AM
"Ladies and Gentlemen. We are sorry for the 3 hrs delay in departure."

"What was the problem?"

"The captain heard a suspicious noise from the left engine".

"Aha, it took you three hours to fix it?"

"No ma'am. It took us three hours to find a replacement pilot."

Greg Smith
06-05-2007, 02:20 PM
Practical jokes abound where I work… From filling the boss’s office with packing peanuts, to putting makeup on the sleeping face of the new pilot that swore he could not be “got”.

Well, several weeks ago, a new Joker King was crowned.

It all happened the day the President came to town. The Secret Service was posted in all the expected places. In addition to their presence in the Emergency Department downstairs, there were several posted on the top floor, where our dispatch center, ready rooms and helipads are located.

Four agents were standing in the wide, glassed in hallway overlooking the helipads. They were exactly what you would expect. Big and serious, with sunglasses, ear buds, and suits containing god knows what concealed underneath.

One of the Flight Medics walked up and stood with the agents. Without looking at the agent next to him, he said to the man in a deadpan tone “You’re attracted to me sexually, aren’t you?”

The stone-faced agent didn’t respond, but the other agents did grin and snicker a very little bit. A big display of emotion for them I am sure. There was a moment of stunned silence from the EMS aircrews present, during which all were afraid the Medic would be shot. After that, they ~ being somewhat less disciplined than the agents ~ well, lost it.

I suspect the agent will not live that incident down for a very long time.

The names of the people and places are being withheld to protect the guilty.